November 27, 2003


Frankenhooker: sounds like it could be awfully funny. Or awfully crap. Either way Warren will love it.

The title alone makes it a DVD worth having. If only as something guests can see, and back away from silently, while looking around for the exit.

Posted by rory at 01:57 PM | TrackBack

Jewelboxing looks nice. Are these the same kind of DVD cases though that tend to break easily?

Posted by rory at 01:52 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

November 26, 2003

Blo^H^H^HCool job

What about working as a porn video store clerk.

How can you not enjoy reading about a job where "repeat offenders get a note on their file that says 'LUBE WARNING'."?

Posted by rory at 02:58 PM

Divine Interventions

Wayne: "Go here:"

Me: (upon seeing the opening splash screen) "Looks nice. What is it?"

Wayne: "Have you checked out the products?"

Me: (trepidation rising) "Checking. Scared. Monitor facing office."

Wayne: "Baby jesus buttplugs and nun-dildos - quite tasteful actually ;-)"

Me: (furious clicking)

Posted by rory at 01:57 PM | Comments (2)

November 25, 2003


Picture it: a tattoo, on your inner thigh, near your naughty bits, that says: "What Would Jesus Do?"

Oooh, yes.

Posted by rory at 03:43 PM | Comments (2)


Play Scrabble online with a friend, via email.

Posted by rory at 02:48 PM


SMS2TV, on DStv, channel 84 (go), Monday to Friday, 5pm to 6pm. Very cool concept.

Posted by rory at 02:32 PM | TrackBack

An email I received

A friend of mine emails me this on Monday:


Did you, last week thursday, meet my friend G---, blonde Valkyrie, and spend the night competing with her for the attentions of the cute waiter?

She described her evening to me, and "Rory" sounded very much like you...


What do you think?

Posted by rory at 02:26 PM

Death by Chocolate

It's Oskar's birthday today! And there be cake. Much, much, chocolatey-delicious cake.

My stomach hurts.

Posted by rory at 10:10 AM | TrackBack

November 24, 2003

Robin on Morality

Robin on the hivemind:

"That's morality old boy: a close personal friend of cultural imperialism. Morality is known to be a prolific drag artist with a reputation for poor makeup. You can often see her dressed in Truth, standing in red-sequined platforms called Dominance, singing at the top of her voice about Reason in the most ridiculous hair.

The tits she wears are tastelessly fake!"

Posted by rory at 04:10 PM


The entire Calvin and Hobbes snowman series.

It needs to snow more in Johannesburg.

Posted by rory at 02:58 PM

Camp Kaalgat... err, Staaldraad

Who cares if we lost? Hot, nekkid rugby player bottoms.

Spank you kindly, Princess Adrain!

Posted by rory at 02:31 PM

Work Christmas party

Ye gods. I allow myself, and thus my liver, about two occasions per year, in which to get, to put it gently, rat-arsed drunk.

Last Thursday. The work Christmas Party. Open bar. 'nuff said.

Posted by rory at 01:41 PM

November 19, 2003


Recently on the Hivemind, Ivo had this to say. Published here with his kind permission.

In this thread the usual batch of misconceptions about money and
capitalism popped up. Let me try to clear 15 of them up:

  • Don't use Telkom as an example of capitalism. It is a monopoly in a state-controlled sector where an appointed official with a patchy track record gets to decides who can provide what service to whom using what technology and at what price. She decides what you as a consumer or business need, she decides if it will be provided to you, at what cost, and from who you may buy it. You can get better examples of capitalism in Cuba.

  • Don't use patents that last too long as an example of how bad capitalism is. Use it as an example of why patent periods should be limited.

  • Don't use the rare exception of patents that are exploited by their non-use as an example of why the right to own your inventions are bad. Just expose such cases and shame the patent holder into licensing the patent. Or invent competition and put them out of business.

  • Don't consider money primary or superior to any other product, substance or quality. It is simply a freely and voluntarily exchangeable representation of the production of goods and services, and makes barter easier and less costly. And since I, for one, need goods and services to live, my right to property IS my right to live, and my right to live can only be granted through my right to property.

  • Don't use the fact that crime occurs as an example of how bad capitalism is. It's an example of how bad crime is, and such crime is not an accepted part of the system.

  • Don't fall for feeling sorry for supposed small-time crooks who "need to" do crime, but feeling outraged by rich crooks. They're morally equivalent, and your rights are subject to the indiscriminate whims of both.

  • Don't use corruption as an example of why money (or the system) is bad. Corruption occurs in any socio-economic system, and should be curbed by a sound legal system and a free, intelligent press. I'd wager corruption is least likely to occur in well-developed free-market democracies.

  • Don't use patents for stupid things as examples, except to show why the US Patent Office should hire smart people to whom the obvious won't appear non-obvious.

  • Don't use the abuse of legal loopholes as an example. In every system there will be loopholes to exploit, and people to exploit them. Sophistication, not revolution, closes loopholes.

  • Don't argue that someone getting richer through trade implies someone else has to get poorer. Trade is not a zero-sum game, and both parties to a voluntary trade benefit.

  • Don't use the poorest countries as an example of how the system has failed. Why are poor people getting richer everywhere except in countries that keep out democracy, capitalism, trade and development? This is no coincidence.

  • Don't use exorbitant wealth as an example. That doesn't explain why one should break the system that has made everyone - including both poor and exorbitantly rich - richer than ever before in human history. Imbalance is not poverty. Gaps between rich and poor show no absolute levels, and are consequently meaningless. One person's poverty does not depend on another person's wealth, or vice versa.

  • Don't claim exploitation by the rich as an example. If you're poor, I can't profit by trading with you. So it is in my interest that you're rich, whether or not I am rich too. The same goes for countries. It is in nobody's interest for people to be poor. And the few out there that do go in for short-term profit should (and will) be exposed by the media, stopped by the law, and punished by the market and their investors.

  • Don't be paranoid. There will always be people and groups of people who are richer than you and more powerful than you. There will even be some among them who will abuse wealth or power. But the rich aren't out to get the poor. They have better things to do in their hard-earned leisure time.

  • Don't use abuse of power as an example of why the system is flawed. In a sufficiently advanced capitalist system, consumers can have much more power than the producers that depend on consumer choices. And they can abuse it too.

    Finally, to repeat a well-made point of earlier: if money is evil, why
    does the lack of it cause so many ills and injustices?

Posted by rory at 03:19 PM

November 18, 2003

Here we go!

(CNN) -- Massachusetts' highest court ruled Tuesday that the state cannot deny gays and lesbians the right to marry, a ruling that could make the state the first to recognize gay marriage.

Posted by rory at 04:37 PM | Comments (1)

Comfortable home toys

Toys, toys, toys: Living Control and Primare.

Posted by rory at 02:27 PM | TrackBack

It was a dark and stormy afternoon...

T'was dark and stormy afternoon
Highveld-wide, you see.
Not a worker stirred,
or spoke, just up-clicked MP3.

Simple highhats, booming bass,
muting thunder, coding space.

Ventured forth,
Got rained on.
Returned, irritated.

Posted by rory at 02:16 PM

November 17, 2003

In attendance

Saw this little bit of wierdness in Sandton City on Friday night.

No, I don't know either.

Posted by rory at 05:02 PM | TrackBack

A lotta Scotti

Saw 'Kiss Me Guido' again last night. Man, oh, man: Nick Scotti.

Posted by rory at 03:23 PM | TrackBack

Belle de Jour

Belle de Jour: The diary of a London Call Girl.

Soon to be relaunched: The Rites, under its new name, Balls de Jour.

Just kidding.


Posted by rory at 02:50 PM | TrackBack

Confess. It's good for the Internet.

And have a grouphug.

Posted by rory at 11:19 AM

November 14, 2003

Get Fuzzy

Just finished catching up on Get Fuzzy. A whole couple of weeks' worth.

Posted by rory at 03:02 PM | Comments (2)

ICQ authorisations, again

I just get loads and loads of authorisation requests from young, mostly Russian and foreign, women on ICQ. Is this just me?

Posted by rory at 11:03 AM | TrackBack

November 13, 2003

The blog to end all blogs

Finally, there is exactly the kind of blog I need on a daily basis.

Also, a good review can come in, uh, handy.

Posted by rory at 05:16 PM

November 12, 2003


Morne passed along this bit of hilarity, emailed to everyone at his company yesterday:

"I am desperately looking for a good home for my dog. He is a x-Labrador, 2 years old, very friendly, loves to play & has a fantastic nature, very good with children & other dogs, but unfortunately he doesn't like cats.

He is from the SPCA & they told me he would be ok with the cats.

I have now had him for 6 months & he definitely is not ok with the cats!

If you know of anyone who might be interested in giving him a good home
please let me know.
082 xxx xxxx

PS. Alternatively, if you know of anyone who might want 4 cats... that would also help."

Posted by rory at 03:02 PM | TrackBack

Crazy remixed-up kids... and the music industry, which is just crazy.

Having failed to outlaw file-sharing software, it has turned its wrath on the biggest users of that software: teenagers. Suddenly, weirdly, the entertainment business is teaming up with cops and conservative politicians to wage war on its own customers.

This from an industry "where financial prudence traditionally meant buying your cocaine in bulk..."

Posted by rory at 11:39 AM | TrackBack

November 11, 2003


XMLTV for South African (DStv) listings. Available here. Nifty one, Flash.

Posted by rory at 04:12 PM | TrackBack

Overcome email overload

Email overload, the scourge of our time. Apparently.

The jury is still out on blog-overload.

Posted by rory at 03:43 PM | TrackBack

Flatus odour judge, and more

What -- exactly -- are the worst jobs in science?

Posted by rory at 03:40 PM

Bring back the laughter

And just what is this better known as?

Posted by rory at 11:58 AM | Comments (1)


I really gotta go to one of these. 3500 tickets of 8000 already sold.

And who cares if some poor soldier found a sticky condom?

Posted by rory at 11:12 AM | TrackBack


Porn mag sales are going limp. Yet another side effect of this new fangled Internet thang.

Posted by rory at 10:48 AM | TrackBack

November 10, 2003

Monday sweat

It's an insanely hot day in Gauteng. A forecast of 27 degrees C turns out to feel much, much warmer. Well, at least indoors out of the path of the airconditioning currents. And it's 4:30 in the afternoon. Which means, as the highveld settles down for the evening (and by that I mean small-arms-gun-fire only), that it's only going to get warmer.

I tend to live by the edict "don't move, don't sweat". But when your only activity is lifting your right arm to change channels, and you're still sweating, something is terribly, terribly Jo'burg.

Thank god my office seat is fabric, not leather.

Posted by rory at 03:35 PM | TrackBack

Quote this now

"If you have no imagination, you need not fret. A swedish pharmaceutical company will sell you a very vivid -- though temporary -- one for a nominal fee."
- Anonymous

Posted by rory at 03:13 PM | TrackBack

Sonor Audio

These guys have a seriously good range, and a seriously, seriously good range of speakers. Heavy, too.

Posted by rory at 12:04 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack


Would you like a Google mirror?

Posted by rory at 10:53 AM | TrackBack

Stiff discipline

"...By the time the afternoon lessons began, there was no hiding what they had done."

Posted by rory at 10:48 AM | TrackBack

November 06, 2003

Soggy Biscuit Showdown

or... "Why I wish I'd gone to a single-sex boarding school".

You know the drill—pantless pledges gathered around, each breathlessly racing to make sure he's not the last to spill seed, lest he be the sorry chump forced to wolf down the dreaded Soggy Biscuit. It's a time-tested bonding ceremony, but with so many options in the cracker aisle these days, how's a busy Pledge Master to choose the best starch for his hungry up-and-comers? Well look no further...

Posted by rory at 02:11 PM | Comments (1)

Men's Health

Saw the Men's Health Look 2003 last night on MNet. Manflesh left, right, and centre.

Janez, the winner, is just about most appropriately defined as 'sex on legs'.

Posted by rory at 02:09 PM | TrackBack

Conversations with God

Well, it's more like an audience with God. But at least entry is free.

(Withdrawl, however, carries a penalty.)

Posted by rory at 02:04 PM | TrackBack