September 04, 2003

Dead boys

Adrian and I came up with this list.

  1. Dead boys dont say no.
  2. Dead boys don't mind swallowing.
  3. Dead boys dont have to come up for air.
  4. Dead boys dont want to cuddle afterwards.
  5. Dead boys wont call you the next day.
  6. Dead boys don't mind sharing.
  7. Dead boys won't steal from you.
  8. Dead boys don't care about your drug habit.
  9. Dead boys don't mind being left alone all day.
  10. Dead boys provide a convenient flat surface for schnarfing.
  11. Dead boys get rigor mortis.
  12. Dead boys don't need viagra.
  13. Dead boys stay hard for longer.
  14. Dead boys don't care if they're straight.
  15. Dead boys dont want to go out for dinner.
  16. Dead boys are dinner (cf. Jeffrey Dahmer).
  17. Dead boys don't mind if you fuck on the first date.
  18. Dead boys let you pick the movie. every time.
  19. ... .... maggots tickle.
  20. Dead boys don't take forever in the bathroom.
  21. Dead boys contain their own lube.
  22. Dead boys won't talk about you to their friends.
  23. Dead boys dont get STD's.
  24. Dead boys dont get old.
  25. Dead boys don't get jealous.
  26. Dead boys provide interesting dinner topic conversation (as the candle holder).
  27. Dead boys don't go out of style.
  28. Dead boys don't go out.
  29. Dead boys dont hog the blankets.
  30. Dead boys know their place.
  31. Dead boys stack nicely, like dinnerware.
  32. Dead boys don't embarrass you in public.
  33. Dead boys dont care about penis size.
  34. Dead boys dont require condoms.
  35. you don't have to make a dead boy cum.
  36. Dead boys can go forever.
  37. Dead boys dont complain you work too much.
  38. Dead boys are both cheap AND easy.
  39. Dead boys are low maintenance.
  40. Dead boys won't press charges.
  :::  a Thought ritual performed at 02:00 PM   :::   ritual retributions [0]   :::   | TrackBack